Dudes today I took grandpa to the back and spine doctor. We’ve been to this doctor before and grandpa loves the guy (you know as much as he is able due to his um, lack of trust with the medical profession). The doctor, Dr. Heros (I know! And he really is) was in the Army and since grandpa is all about his military service, it is a match made in heaven. I love that this doctor always takes the time to actually talk to grandpa (which means he has to yell to him basically), and listen even when grandpa goes off on a tangent about getting hooked on dope (prescription drugs). Grandpa has never been hooked on prescription drugs but for some reason he lives in constant fear of it and occasionally he likes to quit everything cold turkey, which leads to pain and comments like, "just take me to the morgue." Now I’m not a huge medicine fan myself, but the things grandpa says crack me up.
Here’s grandpa on a pack of pills he returned because they made him "doopy"
Grandpa: "so where are these made, Afganistan?"
Dr. Heros: "no, it says here they are made in Canada."
Grandpa: "but they’ve got poppies in them."
Dr. Heros: "No these are made in a lab."
Grandpa: "I don’t want to get addicted to the poppies."
Dr. Heros: "I assure you sir these are on the up and up, nothing black market about these."
Grandpa: "okay now take a look at my trigger finger."
LOL I had spent the whole time in the lobby trying to convince grandpa not to bring up a recent blood test or the trigger finger to the SPINE doctor. He has this blood test showing that everything is alright like kidney function and the like. Grandpa starts laughing and says, "Can you believe this, my god damn doctor things I’m fine. Do I look fine to you?" I tried to explain that just like a bone scan wouldn’t show diabetes the blood test doesn’t show the bone problems, but grandpa would not hear that logic (that’s good logic right?). This is when I start to get ultra frustrated with the old guy. I mean we’re not trying to trick him. I don’t know if it’s his generation or what, but I would hate to live my life like that thinking everyone and their dog is out to get me.
I did get him a new wheelchair today, we had just borrowed them before. I would borrow the retirement homes to get him down to the car. Then take it back. Then drive to the doctor’s. Then go in and get one of their chairs. Then go get him. Then park the car. Then go to the doctor’s appointment. Then go get the car. Go get him and load him in. Then go take the chair back. So ya, it will save me a few steps. And the thing weighs 45 pounds pounds compared to the million pounds some of the others feel like. And can I just rant for a minute? If you are not handicapped please don’t ever park in a handicapped space. You would not believe how many people still think it’s okay to park in one for a minute or two. But if you already need all the time you have alloted to get a handicapped person out of the car and situated in a chair or walker or whatever you don’t have time to wait for the LAZY ASS who can’t park five spaces away to run in whatever he is dropping off. If you do that I have no sympathy. NONE. You are just asking for some major bad karma. Oh and also to the lazy guy who was sitting right next to the door staring at me the whole time I was trying to get grandpa over the threshold bump while keeping the door open with one hand and holding on to my handbag? I don’t like you either, get off your ass and help your fellow man.
So I came home in a bit of a mood. Then Bj showed me this.
You know what? Everything is suddenly better. 🙂
edited: Bj just sent me this link to all the video used for their Pork and Beans single.