If you haven’t checked out craigslist, then you totally should. More and more cities have been added. You can get tons of cool stuff, meet people, find a job. But the best thing has to be "best of craigslist." People nominate the listings and they are usually hilarious. Here are two of my personal favs:

A Tip for Cellphone Junkies: A Phone is Not an Invisible Forcefield.

Yes, that was me who ran into you this morning on the way to work and didn’t apologize. What did you expect? You were weaving all over the sidewalk like an old drunk trying to get home. It was enough to trying to get around your zombie carcass in the first place. Am I supposed to predict your next thoughtless sideways move based on the pseudo-voice coming through that piece of plastic?

Next time you have to take or make a call, instead of pacing around like you’re in a protective bubble, why not try standing against a building? I know you think you’re "multi-tasking" by walking and talking, but you’re not. You’re only talking and you’re in everyone Else’s way. You are lulled into a state of non-reality when you have that thing against your head. You’re the one who should be apologizing for being such a drone. Wake up and snap out of it.

Why Geeks and Nerds Are Worth It…

In the wide world of dating, there are many options. Do you go for the flashy guy with the smooth smile, or the dude in the corner typing away on his laptop? The following are reasons why I think my fellow females should pay more attention to the quiet geeks and nerds, and less attention to the flashy boys.

1.) While geeks and nerds may be awkward, they’re well-meaning 9 out of 10 times. That smooth dude with the sly grin and the spider hands? Wonder what HIS intentions are… plus, I’ve never had a geek guy not call me when he said he would. Score major points THERE.

2.) They’re useful. In this tech-savvy world, it’s great to have a b/f who can make your laptop, desktop, and just about anything else that plugs into a wall behave itself.

3.) They’re more romantic than they’re given credit for. Ok true, their idea of romance might be to make up a spiffy web-page with all the reasons why they love you, with links to pics of you and sonnets and such… but hey. It lasts longer than flowers, plus you can show your friends.

4.) Due to their neglected status, there are plenty to choose from. You like ‘em tall and slender? There are plenty of geeks/nerds who are. You like ‘em smaller with more meat on their bones? Got that too.

5.) They’ve got brains. Come on now, how can intelligence be a bad thing?

6.) Most are quite good at remembering dates. Like birthdates and such, especially if they know it’ll make you happy. Due again to their neglected status, they’re more attentive than guys who “have more options”. Plus, with all that down time without a steady girlfriend, they’ll likely have mental lists of all the things they’d love to do once they GOT a girlfriend.

7.) Sex. Yep. Sex. I’m not really familiar with this myself, but I’ve friends who’ve been intimate with geek guys and it’s raves all around. They say a virgin wrote the Kama Sutra… all that time thinking about sex, imagining sex, dreaming about sex, (they are male after all) coupled with a desire to make you happy? Use your imagination.

8.) They’re relatively low-maintenance. Most can be fueled on pizza, Twinkies and Mt Dew. No complicated dinners needed here, so if you’re not the best cook, eh. Can you order a pizza?

9.) Most frequent bars as often as slugs frequent salt mines. You won’t have to worry much about your geek guy getting his “groove” on with club hotties because, frankly, he’ll be too busy rooting around under his computer wondering where that spare cable went. You won’t have to worry about him flirting with other women because, 9 out of 10 times, he’ll zip right by them in a perfect b-line towards the nearest electronics store. I’ve seen this happen.
Me: “Eww. Victoria Secret’s Models… They’re so skinny. How is that feminine? You can see her ribs!”
Geek Guy: “ooooooo…”
Me: “Hey!” *notices he is staring lustfully towards the computer store*
Geek Guy: “What?”
Me: “Never mind…”

10.) Although he may not want to go to every outing with you, you can arrange swaps, as in, you’ll go to his Gamer Con dressed as an elf princess if he’ll take you to the ballet. Plus, if he doesn’t want to go someplace with you, you won’t have to worry much about what he’s up to. You’ll probably come home to find him asleep on his keyboard in a sea of Mt. Dew cans with code blinking from the screen. It’s ok. He’s used to this. Just toss a blanket over him and turn out the light.

11.) His friends aren’t jerks. I can’t stress this enough. You’ll more likely get “Omg! A GIRL!! Can I see?!” than “Hey hot stuff back that ass up here and let me get some grub on…” They’re awkward geeks too and will, 9 times out of 10, treat you with the utmost respect and, more than likely, a note of awe. A cute girl picked one of their clan to date? It could happen to them! Hope! Drag some of your single girlfriends over, open up a pack of Mt. Dew, crack open the DnD set and get working. Nothing impresses geek guys more than a girl who can hack-n-slash (well ok maybe if she can code… a geek can dream).

12.) They’re rarely if ever possessive. They trust you, so you can be yourself around them. You like to walk around the house in a ratty t-shirt for comfort? He won’t care. He does too! They won’t get pissy if you don’t wear make-up or don’t want to bother primping your hair. If you gain a few pounds, they won’t try their best to make you feel like crap.

13.) They’re usually very well educated. Physics majors and the like. See #5. You won’t have to listen to him blathering on about his car (ok maybe a little), he’ll have loads of other interesting things to talk about. Politics, world events, how much the chicken burgers down at the local place rock, so long as you douse them in hot sauce…

14.) You’ll almost never have to hear, “Yaw dawg whazzap!!” plop out of their mouths. Unless it’s in jest. They spell properly, use correct punctuation, and are able to tell the difference between the toilet and the floor. They almost never get “wasted”, so you won’t have to worry about coming home to find him and his friends passed out on the floor amidst a pile of beer bottles. Mt. Dew cans, perhaps…

15.) And the final reason why geeks and nerds make great boyfriends: They actually give a damn about you. Not how you look (though that’s a plus), not how skinny you are, not how much make-up you primp yourself up with, but they like you for you. That kind of thing lasts longer than “DaMN baby you got a fine ass!!!” Believe me.

Who ever wrote these so hit the nail on the head. Geeks are the best (love you babe), and some people definitely think a cell phone is an invisible forcefield. Now I don’t feel so bad for hitting that sorostitute with my bike.

It’s true, I’m such a snob that I get an annual portrait. Well wait, it’s at the fair and in a photo booth, so it’s not that bad. In fact, it’s quite fun!

I don’t really look like I’m getting that much older, hmm. But I am. I’m 25! Yeah me! I’m a whole quarter of a century. Hey somebody should have gotten me a state set of quarters this year, that would have been cool. Last night I went with Kathy and her friend Katie (a dairy princess) to the fair. So this last one wasn’t actually on my birthday, but close enough. We had a blast getting the requisite greasy food, going on the rides, and checking out everything at the “it slices, it dices” building (as my family calls it). I, of course, went on the swings, the all time best ride in my opinion. And we went on the spider, which was the downfall of the beeg man last year, and resulted in lots of upchuck. I got my Australian licorice and special jerky. We sat in the beer garden to eat and played dollar bingo (and lost). The best part was probably seeing Karen in the Dairy Wives barn (I guess it is just Dairy Woman now). This barn has the best deal going on ice cream. $1.50 for a cone, and it’s huge. And when Karen makes it, it’s even huger. We came back around for her at nine o’clock when she was done volunteering for the night. Then we had some more yummy greasy stuff and checked out all the animals. It’s nice going with farmers who actually know people, and what’s going on and stuff. I decided I am going to get Shetland sheep when I “grow up.” Then I am going to spin my own yarn and make you all hats, ok? So all and all it was a great time at the fair. Every one should go! They say revenues are down and I just don’t see why, it’s the best!

No longer will they be called rainbow sails. My dad informs me this is Tequila Sunrise. I found out more about how my dad got the boat this weekend. He went on one ONCE and then decided it would be cool to get one. This was 1978 and it was his first big investment. He picked out the sail color and chose this one, called Tequila Sunrise by Hobie Cat. Pretty much the coolest colors you can have in my opinion. He then went out once with someone who had one, and from there on out he learned from his “learn to sail the Hobie way” manual that he gave me this weekend. He’s coasted on one pontoon, flipped it, done an endo, pretty much done it all. So now it’s my turn, since he gave me the boat.

And I love my boat.

My dad likes to exaggerate and complain that the thing takes “two fucking hours” to set up, but that is so not true. My brother, dad and I made great time getting the mast up and sails. Yesterday we set up the lake and managed to get pretty banged up, but did not flip! Brent was the first to eat it. He was on the trapeze wires, just hanging out, because we didn’t wear our harnesses. So basically there are these trapeze wire that come off the top of the mast. They are connected under the trampoline and have rings on them that you can hold onto. They also have little metal pieces that you can clip into if you are wearing a harness (like a big old lady diaper type thing). So he had his feet on a pontoon and a trap wire in each hand. Instead of being stretched out all the way his arms were kind of bent and so were his knees. So we got up on one pontoon ( =very fast) and he was sort of leaned out, but then the boat came back down and he was knocked off balance. He lost a wire, then the other, then tried to grab the edge of the tramp. I managed to pull him up when he reached over to me, but he got slammed pretty good and has lots of bruises.

Then later I was out on the wires, leaning way back and we got a gust and I lost my balance and some how managed to swing my self in front of the boat. I totally lost the wires and was clinging to the tramp. So this basically means that the bottom half of my body was in the water and I was being plowed into by the boat. I managed to scramble back on before any major damage happened. After getting back into an arm of the lake we decided to head back or risk loosing our power (wind). We let our sails out and headed back in at a leisurely pace while sipping on beverages in our cooler.

Today we went out on a 31′ boat with some of my dad’s friends, talked a bit, jumped off the back and swam, and then had them bring us back to the dock when the wind picked up. It looked like it was going to be “gnarly” and we had to be really careful getting the sails up. We were going pretty good, but the wind was weird and swirly, so we didn’t stay out long. I sailed over half the time, and all the way back. My dad is not a technical sailor, so I’m not going to be either, but I don’t mind that. I have fun just feeling for the wind. I’ve got to get a few new parts, but the boats doing pretty well. It came down easy too, which was nice.

So I’m burnt from rafting Friday, my arms are sore from rafting and sailing, I’ve got bruises, and a weird rash, but I am a very, very happy girl.

*edited to add: They have tequila sunrise sails on the first episodes of The O.C. Their sail number is: 50862. Every sail number is unique and in order. Just thought that was interesting.