Internet as I sit here in my joggins, having spent about four hours of the day today watching Carrier and knitting it’s hard to see anything wrong with the world. However yesterday I was convinced that the gods were conspiring against me. After waking up and deciding the world wasn’t ready for me yet, I hid back under the covers (okay maybe I wasn’t ready for the world). I heard the phone ring, and didn’t want to go get it but in the end I always get it because it could be grandpa. So I’m rushing to get the phone because I waited to long to let it ring and I did a serious toe plant into the side of my trunk. Which led to a trail of blood to the phone, to the hall closet for Bandaids, and to the bathroom. I seriously took a chunk out of my foot. I got all cleaned up and decided, screw this, I’m going to read in bed. Then the doorbell rang. It was my super nice meter reader. But I still had to trek outside through our seriously dilapidated back yard (it is soooo embarrassing). I think I should just stop telling Mr. cool meter reader that we are ever going to work on it. Of course, I doubt he believes us now anyway.

So that was the start of my day. Then ribbon I was waiting on for a bride somehow got re-routed to Pennsylvania (from California, so I can’t figure that out). It would be funny if I didn’t feel so terrible about it now being late. Things picked up in the afternoon after Sciarrino and I went on a walk. I love our walks, we get some good talking in. Thank goodness she’s back from her sojourn in Europe, that was just too long. Then things started to go crazy again.

Brent called me to tell me there were a lot of ambulances and fire trucks outside grandpa’s retirement place. Well I said, "that is not that unusual those people are all old." But he was persistent and said it was A LOT. I had just gotten back from visiting grandpa so I wasn’t that worried but I called and an out of breath woman said, "not to worry, everyone is evacuated." Then I’m all, what the hell is going on over there??!!?! So I drive over, but the whole street is blocked off. I asked the officer if he could tell me anything, no but he gave me a number to see where they have taken everyone. So I call the non-emergency number and they said people were still in triage, that there was a fire, and that I had to wait at least a half hour before calling back for information.

Of course I’m freaking out, Bj is gone for the evening. So I just sat there and ate organic cheese bunny crackers and a string cheese for dinner while I waited. Eventually I did get a hold of someone. It wasn’t that big of deal. They told me they were still waiting to be let inside but my grandpa was sitting out side complaining with another older gentleman. That is so grandpa. Then about an hour goes by and I get a call from the man himself.

grandpa: "Hey, listen."
me: "Grandpa, I’ve been worried about you, are you okay?"
grandpa: "Ya listen, I need you to add something to your shopping list. I need ice cream. And the paper towels you tear in two."
me: "okay, but are you okay right now?"
grandpa: "I’m damn cold. I think they were trying to kill me out there. You’ve never seen so many old people out in one place in your life."

So funny. I just got back from there. Turns out it was  a dryer fire (as if anyone needed another reason to change their lint filters EVERY TIME YOU PUT IN A LOAD). All 88 residents are fine. Thank god the ones on oxygen are housed away from that area. Scary. It smelled a little, but they had fans going, air filters, and the carpets and everything had already been cleaned. All in all not bad. And grandpa had clipped the article from the paper for me so I could read all about it.

More damage was done last month when grandpa had a little poop explosion problem (okay it wasn’t little). He started trying to clean it up on his own by throwing a pair of joggins on the pile. We tossed those so this weekend will see me sewing more invisible zippers into track suits so he can "get his dick out." Ah such is life.

Now excuse me while I go eat dinner. I put lots of healthy things in my cart, like the kind of eggs where the chickens run wild, and kind of organic soups that cost more than they should (sorry Bj). But the one dollar party pizza won out. So bad….

But so good.